And so another year has ended and a new year has begun.
Those of you who know me, or who have been reading my blog for a while, will know that New Year is one of my least favourite times of year. Of course the turning of the year is meant to be about both reflecting on the past and planning for the future, it is what January is named for – the Roman God Janus, God of endings, beginnings and transitions. My predisposition towards negative interpretations, pessimism and generally feeling inadequate unfortunately mean that, for me, the New Year is associated with a great deal of unhappiness and dwelling on personal deficiencies.
I am trying to do better, but I still ended up in tears on January 1st and feel another bout may be imminent even today.
2015 was a bit of an odd and emotionally turbulent year for me. I struggled to come to terms with turning 30 and the fact that I didn’t even have my boyfriend around to celebrate with me let alone any friends. We also said goodbye to my granddad who was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and passed away just three months later. On top of that I’ve had a lot of soul-searching and mixed emotions surrounding my self-image, my personal relationships and the general direction of my life.
As much as I find the actual transition between years emotionally difficult it is still a good opportunity to set out some goals for the future, not resolutions, but ambitions and things to work on or towards.
- Buy less, Buy Better
- Continue with the weight loss
- Continue with the part-time vegetariamism
- Decorate at least one room
- Take better care of the garden
- Improve my Welsh
- Increase my savings
I suppose I should have something about trying to be more satisfied with what I have or to have a more optimistic outlook, but I don’t want to set myself up to fail!
I hope you have all had a good Christmas and New Year and that you are feeling more optimistic about it all than I am!